Tumblr (3.0; @captainsparklypants)http://captainsparklypants.tumblr.com/Les Miserables: Stealing a loaf of bread may seem like a good idea, but it will literally fuck up your entire life. <br /> Spring Awakening: If you get laid, you die. If you don't get laid, you die. Also don't trust your parents. <br /> Chicago: It's ok to murder people as long as you wear lingerie and can sing and dance.<br /> The King and I: Racism doesn't count if you sing about it. <br /> My Fair Lady: People will like you if you talk like you have a broom stick up your ass. <br /> Hairspray: In the 60s, people will hate you if you're overweight, UNLESS you also hang out with black people. <br /> RENT: AIDS really blows.<br /> A Chorus Line: If you ever audition for a musical chorus, you better have a goddamn good story as to why you became a dancer.<br /> Grease: If your boyfriend doesn't like you, change absolutely everything about yourself to please him.<br /> The Phantom of the Opera: When choosing between a controlling boyfriend and a sociopath composer with a messed up face who dwells in an opera house's basement, take your sweet damn time.<br /> Rocky Horror Picture Show: Finding refuge from a storm in a mansion who's owner is a transvestite will make you inexplicably horny, and seemingly bisexual. <br /> Love Never Dies: Let the crazy woman run off with your son. You may never see him again but you'll get to be with your deformed lover and at least you won't die.<br /> Wicked: If your born green and people make fun of you for it, fake your own death and run away with a scarecrow.<br /> Starlight Express: Believing in the great train god will solve all your problems and get you a girlfriend.http://captainsparklypants.tumblr.com/post/50945812330http://captainsparklypants.tumblr.com/post/50945812330Tue, 21 May 2013 00:49:42 +0100<img src="http://25.media.tumblr.com/adc0ce31a5b765af03073938620d0bbd/tumblr_mls1rwd0hQ1qiryjho1_250.gif"/><br/> <br/><img src="http://24.media.tumblr.com/4803238acc6e9a9260ed3180e51b1e59/tumblr_mls1rwd0hQ1qiryjho2_250.gif"/><br/> <br/><img src="http://24.media.tumblr.com/0bcb86f1d4b9c5589c2691a6bcac9ed2/tumblr_mls1rwd0hQ1qiryjho3_250.gif"/><br/> <br/><img src="http://25.media.tumblr.com/94201e00e4fb24ebaf34340e5dc7ad1f/tumblr_mls1rwd0hQ1qiryjho4_250.gif"/><br/> <br/><img src="http://25.media.tumblr.com/b95795037dcbad019dc5ff9539f962f2/tumblr_mls1rwd0hQ1qiryjho5_250.gif"/><br/> <br/><img src="http://25.media.tumblr.com/5dbadcc3372c2e108693c23c58f09ca6/tumblr_mls1rwd0hQ1qiryjho6_250.gif"/><br/> <br/>http://captainsparklypants.tumblr.com/post/50945590367http://captainsparklypants.tumblr.com/post/50945590367Tue, 21 May 2013 00:46:44 +0100<p><a class="tumblr_blog" href="http://thesockmonkeyrenegade.tumblr.com/post/50797088749/gracethelostgirl-lovewithyous">thesockmonkeyrenegade</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a class="tumblr_blog" href="http://gracethelostgirl.tumblr.com/post/50778650615/lovewithyous-carolineflack-how-do">gracethelostgirl</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a class="tumblr_blog" href="http://lovewithyous.tumblr.com/post/41478573292">lovewithyous</a>:</p> <blockquote> <div> <div> <div> <div> <div> <p><a class="tumblr_blog" href="http://carolineflack.tumblr.com/post/41478527574/how-do-you-make-a-guy-stop-texting-you">carolineflack</a>:</p> <blockquote> <div> <div> <div> <div> <div> <p>HOW DO YOU MAKE A GUY STOP TEXTING YOU</p> </div> </div> </div> </div> </div> </blockquote> <p>HOW DO YOU MAKE A GUY <em><strong>START</strong></em> TEXTING YOU</p> </div> </div> </div> </div> </div> </blockquote> <p>HOW DO YOU MAKE A GUY</p> </blockquote> <p><img alt="image" src="http://media.tumblr.com/17908ca79b8ab02528a7e0e458d66845/tumblr_inline_mn1bkwk3Wa1qz4rgp.jpg"/></p> </blockquote>http://captainsparklypants.tumblr.com/post/50862680240http://captainsparklypants.tumblr.com/post/50862680240Mon, 20 May 2013 00:39:16 +0100<img src="http://25.media.tumblr.com/546b8c2f74b7f37b7776d5c164f2e1ce/tumblr_mn150mjT4b1r9mp5uo1_500.jpg"/><br/> <br/><img src="http://25.media.tumblr.com/ed6c74478ddff949322202f2fa581d64/tumblr_mn150mjT4b1r9mp5uo2_500.jpg"/><br/> <br/><img src="http://24.media.tumblr.com/a9a7e53e02eae4ece517e674227963f5/tumblr_mn150mjT4b1r9mp5uo3_500.jpg"/><br/> <br/><img src="http://25.media.tumblr.com/bf289233c4f2af47a806ef2bf7fbadbb/tumblr_mn150mjT4b1r9mp5uo4_500.jpg"/><br/> <br/><p><a class="tumblr_blog" href="http://thenewmsmarvel.tumblr.com/post/50841128723/librarian-byday-i-swear-i-will-do-this-every">thenewmsmarvel</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a class="tumblr_blog" href="http://librarian-byday.tumblr.com/post/50790261422/i-swear-i-will-do-this-every-single-time-one-of">librarian-byday</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p>I swear, I will do this every single time one of my little brothers graduates from somewhere.</p> </blockquote> <p>Callum, I hope you realise I’m doing this to you on graduation day! :’D</p> </blockquote>http://captainsparklypants.tumblr.com/post/50855407434http://captainsparklypants.tumblr.com/post/50855407434Sun, 19 May 2013 23:02:52 +0100<img src="http://25.media.tumblr.com/5252d46460114e1551b9a767322a41f9/tumblr_mn25cdr9981qb6v2ao10_500.gif"/><br/> <br/><img src="http://25.media.tumblr.com/a5d17e5d857d121e0c6c37441337eb78/tumblr_mn25cdr9981qb6v2ao1_250.gif"/><br/> <br/><img src="http://25.media.tumblr.com/8c96116a8a6330f62b042b25d90f6df1/tumblr_mn25cdr9981qb6v2ao3_250.gif"/><br/> <br/><img src="http://24.media.tumblr.com/5f7b08d22ad6ef8b8ffdc07fba0075b1/tumblr_mn25cdr9981qb6v2ao2_250.gif"/><br/> <br/><img src="http://25.media.tumblr.com/fb954ff2e3fa8fa22ecac85a36d510f7/tumblr_mn25cdr9981qb6v2ao4_250.gif"/><br/> <br/><img src="http://25.media.tumblr.com/2876bad97ca282a8ca16237d0c7f7367/tumblr_mn25cdr9981qb6v2ao9_r1_250.gif"/><br/> <br/><img src="http://24.media.tumblr.com/e4cbdfd3afea16f8d7297458dece8b22/tumblr_mn25cdr9981qb6v2ao5_250.gif"/><br/> <br/><img src="http://25.media.tumblr.com/1400a46683c53db4a764d8cf826600f0/tumblr_mn25cdr9981qb6v2ao7_250.gif"/><br/> <br/><img src="http://24.media.tumblr.com/445c7e540673f86f8564f005d82f3bb3/tumblr_mn25cdr9981qb6v2ao8_250.gif"/><br/> <br/><img src="http://25.media.tumblr.com/4866e3d8e09b49cc434d229ac2e688a2/tumblr_mn25cdr9981qb6v2ao6_r2_500.gif"/><br/> <br/><p><a class="tumblr_blog" href="http://domesticabusewillsaveusall.tumblr.com/post/50842687892">domesticabusewillsaveusall</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><strong>Stefon’s Wedding |<a href="http://www.hulu.com/watch/491721">x</a></strong><strong>| SNL 18/5/2013 </strong></p> <blockquote> <p>German Smurfs, Gizblow the coked up Gremlin, Human Fire Extinguishers, Ben Affleck and is that Ryan Seacrest? No it’s a drowned albino who looks like Axl Rose.</p> </blockquote> <p>I’m going to miss Bill Hader.</p> </blockquote>http://captainsparklypants.tumblr.com/post/50855056373http://captainsparklypants.tumblr.com/post/50855056373Sun, 19 May 2013 22:58:36 +0100Jason: I killed by the Joker and then blown up.<br /> Stephanie: I was Tortured by Black Mask<br /> Damian: I went up against my Clone and was stabbed in the stomach.<br /> Dick: I tripped over a rock....<br /> Jason, Steph, and Damian:...........<br /> http://captainsparklypants.tumblr.com/post/50821368408http://captainsparklypants.tumblr.com/post/50821368408Sun, 19 May 2013 15:36:39 +0100<p>I&#8217;ve just realised that typing is such a weird word. It&#8217;s like ty-ping. Thank you ping. </p>http://captainsparklypants.tumblr.com/post/50781656541http://captainsparklypants.tumblr.com/post/50781656541Sun, 19 May 2013 04:03:34 +0100<img src="http://25.media.tumblr.com/6d75d8ae4763083977ae535e52ad3705/tumblr_mmnqynNxsF1raryxdo1_250.gif"/><br/> <br/><img src="http://25.media.tumblr.com/375a75bafa99321ab2544a9163d86d92/tumblr_mmnqynNxsF1raryxdo3_250.gif"/><br/> <br/><img src="http://24.media.tumblr.com/1cc26b24a1e9d1eac29bb90d83065d11/tumblr_mmnqynNxsF1raryxdo4_250.gif"/><br/> <br/><img src="http://25.media.tumblr.com/41906c8627a24702e8b1308e2d725cb4/tumblr_mmnqynNxsF1raryxdo2_250.gif"/><br/> <br/><img src="http://24.media.tumblr.com/aceb37ab099c7baf4e234426fe83eb30/tumblr_mmnqynNxsF1raryxdo5_250.gif"/><br/> <br/><img src="http://25.media.tumblr.com/e55bf4280f8d0925e42e6f6b1c8f3fec/tumblr_mmnqynNxsF1raryxdo6_250.gif"/><br/> <br/><img src="http://24.media.tumblr.com/1cf53f2b3f187f2d24478cc018f500bc/tumblr_mmnqynNxsF1raryxdo7_250.gif"/><br/> <br/><img src="http://25.media.tumblr.com/498668d162377e02d761fe0cdacef926/tumblr_mmnqynNxsF1raryxdo8_250.gif"/><br/> <br/><img src="http://24.media.tumblr.com/0f0a3335388f9bc5c12e8347ddf9d3bb/tumblr_mmnqynNxsF1raryxdo10_250.gif"/><br/> <br/><img src="http://25.media.tumblr.com/da296c8323a259303504da0370d1f30a/tumblr_mmnqynNxsF1raryxdo9_250.gif"/><br/> <br/><p><a class="tumblr_blog" href="http://randomly-regenerating.tumblr.com/post/50205334287/this-is-a-rusty-marcel-brauneis-appreciation">randomly-regenerating</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p>This is a Rusty/Marcel Brauneis appreciation gifset. [<a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sfL7NO2pOC0&list=FLnpi-7a5JMcFmpNqNZZ4ZiQ">x</a>]</p> </blockquote>http://captainsparklypants.tumblr.com/post/50778564605http://captainsparklypants.tumblr.com/post/50778564605Sun, 19 May 2013 03:19:33 +0100<img src="http://25.media.tumblr.com/3ec17eea5bfaa04dd4e6e9d6429bbd84/tumblr_mmued8Rqu61s13i4go7_500.jpg"/><br/> <br/><img src="http://25.media.tumblr.com/61b60730a789dd1369ae6052b46b26c2/tumblr_mmued8Rqu61s13i4go1_500.jpg"/><br/> <br/><img src="http://25.media.tumblr.com/cb8589cef91c36beb52bfd48d3438731/tumblr_mmued8Rqu61s13i4go2_500.jpg"/><br/> <br/><img src="http://25.media.tumblr.com/4789e67bae24c64e91623c3a88c0cb79/tumblr_mmued8Rqu61s13i4go4_500.jpg"/><br/> <br/><img src="http://25.media.tumblr.com/0d5dce3eed0d5a9c48c026871d8f8dd7/tumblr_mmued8Rqu61s13i4go3_500.jpg"/><br/> <br/><img src="http://25.media.tumblr.com/c7a668eff060db2eb97194c7124bcf47/tumblr_mmued8Rqu61s13i4go5_500.jpg"/><br/> <br/><img src="http://25.media.tumblr.com/5fc574fe68bbbebaa83ce6eb24887026/tumblr_mmued8Rqu61s13i4go6_500.jpg"/><br/> <br/><p><a class="tumblr_blog" href="http://electra-the-electric-train.tumblr.com/post/50495388048/assorted-backstage-miscellaneous-photos-of-gareth">electra-the-electric-train</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p>Assorted backstage/miscellaneous photos of <strong>Gareth Bretherton</strong> in costume as Electra, from his personal website.</p> </blockquote> <p>Oh, hey Gaz.</p>http://captainsparklypants.tumblr.com/post/50778338095http://captainsparklypants.tumblr.com/post/50778338095Sun, 19 May 2013 03:16:17 +0100<p><a class="tumblr_blog" href="http://saminmytemple.tumblr.com/post/50756671455/bananaspanner-curiosity-inspired-the-kat">saminmytemple</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a class="tumblr_blog" href="http://bananaspanner.tumblr.com/post/50756402425/curiosity-inspired-the-kat">bananaspanner</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a class="tumblr_blog" href="http://curiosity-inspired-the-kat.tumblr.com/post/50756161902/buggerallthisforalark-petition-for-the-cast-of">curiosity-inspired-the-kat</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a class="tumblr_blog" href="http://buggerallthisforalark.tumblr.com/post/50756105008/petition-for-the-cast-of-horrible-histories-to-be">buggerallthisforalark</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p>petition for the cast of horrible histories to be britain’s entry next year</p> </blockquote> <p>yes.</p> </blockquote> <p>that…that might work.</p> </blockquote> <p>this needs to happen</p> </blockquote> <p>YES.</p>http://captainsparklypants.tumblr.com/post/50765739125http://captainsparklypants.tumblr.com/post/50765739125Sun, 19 May 2013 00:04:41 +0100<img src="http://25.media.tumblr.com/48358000f2ed649a1e015857608393b2/tumblr_mmp6bhvjcc1raryxdo1_250.gif"/><br/> <br/><img src="http://24.media.tumblr.com/dd851c6bbdcfcee4f8a271ffef4c53ce/tumblr_mmp6bhvjcc1raryxdo2_250.gif"/><br/> <br/><img src="http://24.media.tumblr.com/aa051c8da1a428d5fa268859f9379749/tumblr_mmp6bhvjcc1raryxdo4_250.gif"/><br/> <br/><p><a class="tumblr_blog" href="http://randomly-regenerating.tumblr.com/post/50290658561/i-just-really-like-this-train-okay-x">randomly-regenerating</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p>I just really like this train, okay? [<a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fEV2p0mo_0E&list=HL1368381973">x</a>]</p> </blockquote>http://captainsparklypants.tumblr.com/post/50536870309http://captainsparklypants.tumblr.com/post/50536870309Thu, 16 May 2013 01:14:12 +0100<p><a class="tumblr_blog" href="http://rosierosina.tumblr.com/post/50012121814/i-have-an-inordinate-amount-of-love-for-both-joyce">rosierosina</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p>I have an inordinate amount of love for both Joyce DiDonato and Alice Coote. I definitely have problem, but if loving them is wrong, I don’t wanna be right.</p> <p><img alt="image" src="http://media.tumblr.com/8dd34ca3741a8bc6bc78e012d2467cd1/tumblr_inline_mlxofjZm1u1qz4rgp.gif"/></p> </blockquote>http://captainsparklypants.tumblr.com/post/50536597119http://captainsparklypants.tumblr.com/post/50536597119Thu, 16 May 2013 01:10:31 +0100<img src="http://25.media.tumblr.com/07e03e16e27310b87604b1048933bde7/tumblr_mmbv4r2bTM1s6ikpgo1_500.jpg"/><br/> <br/><img src="http://24.media.tumblr.com/90c347201404fba048240edcfc299d84/tumblr_mmbv4r2bTM1s6ikpgo2_500.jpg"/><br/> <br/><img src="http://24.media.tumblr.com/29cfd3ed2eda68a9a1e8df0d65433994/tumblr_mmbv4r2bTM1s6ikpgo3_400.jpg"/><br/> <br/><img src="http://24.media.tumblr.com/f1d8f6866b1e6ae1d7d0dfe3211bca4f/tumblr_mmbv4r2bTM1s6ikpgo9_500.jpg"/><br/> <br/><p><a class="tumblr_blog" href="http://helenakoonings.tumblr.com/post/49684103687/rosierosina-consider-this-my-parting-gift">helenakoonings</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p>@rosierosina Consider this my parting gift. <strong>>:)</strong></p> </blockquote>http://captainsparklypants.tumblr.com/post/50536534529http://captainsparklypants.tumblr.com/post/50536534529Thu, 16 May 2013 01:09:40 +0100<p><a class="tumblr_blog" href="http://mandatoryupgrades.tumblr.com/post/49880265665/anyone-who-thinks-shakespeare-is-boring-apparently">mandatoryupgrades</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p>Anyone who thinks Shakespeare is boring apparently missed the greatest stage direction ever written:</p> <p><img alt="image" src="http://media.tumblr.com/c77db60b452c564c85f5112408a408d1/tumblr_inline_mmg65numvM1qz4rgp.png"/></p> <p>I want that to be the final line of my biography.</p> </blockquote>http://captainsparklypants.tumblr.com/post/50302088465http://captainsparklypants.tumblr.com/post/50302088465Mon, 13 May 2013 01:19:15 +0100<p><a class="tumblr_blog" href="http://lilkimkpa.tumblr.com/post/49992566888/back-to-what-i-was-before-back-where-im-known">lilkimkpa</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><span>Back to what I was before</span><br/><span>Back where I’m known</span><br/><span>Back in my own very small pond </span><br/><span>Laugh with my friends when I arrive</span><br/><span>We’ll drop the top and just drive.</span><br/><span>That’s fine with me</span></p> </blockquote>http://captainsparklypants.tumblr.com/post/50206369784http://captainsparklypants.tumblr.com/post/50206369784Sun, 12 May 2013 00:53:32 +0100<p>All I wanted to do this evening was to watch a stupid, childish film.</p>http://captainsparklypants.tumblr.com/post/50205368605http://captainsparklypants.tumblr.com/post/50205368605Sun, 12 May 2013 00:38:18 +0100<p>Isn&#8217;t it amazing how you can have an amazing day, feel wonderful all day, come home and then you realise that you are incapable of having anything good happen to you without something else crashing down and destroying that good mood?</p>http://captainsparklypants.tumblr.com/post/50205226295http://captainsparklypants.tumblr.com/post/50205226295Sun, 12 May 2013 00:36:08 +0100<p><a class="tumblr_blog" href="http://221bitssmallerontheoutside.tumblr.com/post/43393402733/theangryviolinist-lol-oh-tchaikovsky">221bitssmallerontheoutside</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a class="tumblr_blog" href="http://theangryviolinist.tumblr.com/post/39461339436/lol-oh-tchaikovsky-tchaikovsky-whta-r-u-doing">theangryviolinist</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><img alt="image" src="http://media.tumblr.com/b28ce0834e071195e0c861b3fff88d67/tumblr_inline_mfzor8DVbS1raz6sm.png"/></p> <p>lol oh tchaikovsky</p> <p><img alt="image" src="http://media.tumblr.com/a34adae2d1894465478792b884487ab5/tumblr_inline_mfzorhY0Nn1raz6sm.png"/></p> <p>tchaikovsky whta r u doing</p> <p><img alt="image" src="http://media.tumblr.com/a24f92b55f2e70d506d5201620e12bb0/tumblr_inline_mfzory0x3A1raz6sm.png"/></p> <p>tchaikovsky wat the fcuk is ur problem</p> <p><img alt="image" src="http://media.tumblr.com/8cd18c705292af96e537aff16b5dda85/tumblr_inline_mfzosigXp61raz6sm.png"/></p> <p>TCHAIKOVSKY STAHP</p> </blockquote> <p>The url of the person who posted this makes this so much funnier.</p> </blockquote>http://captainsparklypants.tumblr.com/post/50203167254http://captainsparklypants.tumblr.com/post/50203167254Sun, 12 May 2013 00:05:05 +0100Person: How do lesbians have sex?<br /> Me: The question is how do they stop.http://captainsparklypants.tumblr.com/post/50006367742http://captainsparklypants.tumblr.com/post/50006367742Thu, 09 May 2013 12:30:12 +0100<img src="http://25.media.tumblr.com/09c29cfec4d7774fc6c1de2fbab744f3/tumblr_mmhtjoip3p1rl7pq8o1_500.jpg"/><br/><br/><p><a class="tumblr_blog" href="http://yankeedivo.tumblr.com/post/49982741943/operaswag-susan-graham-i-dare-you-to-get">yankeedivo</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a class="tumblr_blog" href="http://operaswag.tumblr.com/post/49981920049/susan-graham-i-dare-you-to-get-cuter-i-freaking">operaswag</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p>Susan Graham, I dare you to get cuter.  I freaking dare you.  Wait, no don’t do it.  It may kill me. </p> </blockquote> <p>This is why opera singers are so great.</p> </blockquote>http://captainsparklypants.tumblr.com/post/50006264557http://captainsparklypants.tumblr.com/post/50006264557Thu, 09 May 2013 12:27:17 +0100